Monday, August 24, 2015

Storytelling for Week 1: The Plane Tree

THE PLANE TREE

"Two Travellers, walking in the noonday sun, sought the shade of a widespreading tree to rest. As they lay looking up among the pleasant leaves, they saw that it was a Plane Tree.
"How useless is the Plane!" said one of them. "It bears no fruit whatever, and only serves to litter the ground with leaves."
"Ungrateful creatures!" said a voice from the Plane Tree. "You lie here in my cooling shade, and yet you say I am useless! Thus ungratefully, O Jupiter, do men receive their blessings!"
Our best blessings are often the least appreciated."
(Original Fable)
Bibliography: "The Plane Tree" by Aesop from Aesop for Children With pictures by Milo Winter (1919). Web Source: The Project Gutenberg

The Travelers and The Tree 

On an ordinary afternoon two travelers were passing through the plains on an inordinately hot autumn day.  The sun was in the center of the sky and the two travelers, drenched with sweat, became discouraged that it was not even the hottest part of the day yet.  

"How much farther?  I need some food or I might collapse," yapped one traveler to their companion.  
"At least three more days of walking but there’s a river a day’s walk away," replied the other who was soon becoming short of breath.  

 As they trudged on with full packs on their backs they spotted a small clump of trees that stood in the middle of the plains.  Most of the trees were small but one aged tree stood tall and was full of bright green leaves.  
"Maybe there's some fruit in those trees over there!"  Stated one traveler as both of them picked up their pace.  Though the tree was plentiful in leaves, it left them no options for fruit or food.  

"This is completely useless, we are stuck in the middle of a wasteland and can get no relief.  We're not even halfway through our journey and there's no sign of water.  We'll be stuck wandering in this place for days."  The traveler said as they slumped down below the tree and spread out their legs to maybe take a quick nap.

(The Travellers and The Plane Tree illustrated by Arthur Rackham and found at Childhood Reading.)

"You ungrateful fools," a strong and intimidating voice bellowed from seemingly nowhere.  "You lie down to escape the sun under my branches and curl up in a blanket of my leaves and yet you think I am the useless one?  How long have I been stuck here to be an oasis for travelers, whereas I am stuck and can do nothing to receive water in this impenetrable drought.  Every day I sit out here and suffer.  I cannot spring out of my roots in search of water, yet you forfeit your legs to lay under me the first chance you get.  Our best blessings are often the least appreciated." 

The travelers soon realized it was the tree that was yelling at them.  At first, they were offended because they were exhausted and could barely even feel their legs after using them all day.  But then they thought about it and the tree was right.  All it did was provide and during this drought it had barely received the only thing it needed, water.  

"Here take the rest of our water.  We can walk to the nearest stream in a day, but you my friend do not have that luxury."  One traveler said as both of them poured out the water remaining in their botas.  The tree was astonished by the kindness of the two travelers and finally got some relief in the drought. 
 
The travelers were soon back on their journey, and for some reason a bit of shade seemed to follow them the rest of their way.

Author's Note:  I included the original fable with this story so please refer to it above if you are confused.  I wanted my version to have a hint of compassion but I love the moral from the original story so I still wanted to include it. 

3 comments:

  1. Your story is a wonderful interpretation of the fable! It was easy to follow and using the text from the original helped to tie it even further together. Your style of writing was enjoyable to read and kept me interested until the end. I like how you added compassion to the end of your story. It was a nice ending that left me happy and hopeful for the travelers.

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  2. I decided to pick your story as part of the feedback project because I really like it! What really impresses me is how you managed to expand the tale to include more sensory input (just how ridiculously hot it is, why the people are probably cranky enough to insult a tree). The inclusion of the realisation of the error on the part of the travellers and then their compassion (and subsequent reward, nice touch!) is a great addition as it makes the story feel more complete.

    Word Choice: 'Yapped' really stuck out at me as perhaps not being the right word for the spot. Whined or groused may fit better.

    Sentence structure (?): Don't forget that after a quotation the next word is capitalized. You can also trim down some words from sentences so they hold more of a punch. I find that sometimes short and direct sentences help the action flow better than long complex ones.
    For instance: "You ungrateful fools!" A loud, intimidating voice bellowed.

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  3. I found this story on your looking back post. It is very nicely written. I read the original story before and I see how much details you have added. Great job on elaborating on how the tree feels. And great job in giving it a happy ending, which doesn't happen too often. I saw few errors, but it's nothing a third look over won't fix. Again, excellent job on the details and the story!

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